can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
The lady at walmart just said she is so happy im still alive....Was i that drunk on the 4th? Dont answer that
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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