My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
Randomize
