So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
My boobs are feeling quite sensitive so I told them, " you is smart, you is kind, you is important" that should do the trick.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
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