so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
Now would be a great time to stop wondering " Who let the dogs out" and go to sleep
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
I need to start using my boobs for good instead of weed. Although really they're kind of the same thing
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
We fucked like animals on that lion king beanbag chair that your mom got you for your 10th bday
Randomize
