Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
Would you wanna look up as you cum and for a split-second see your dad?
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Best part of Friday afternoon drinking? Having ping pong balls thrown into my cleavage.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
It feels appropriate that the wallet of my high school and college years would die at the hands of a spilled bong. Which in and of itself is a solid metaphor for those years.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
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