My dad just yelled at me for going to youth group with out telling him. Apparently going out to fuck a girl without telling him gets me a high 5, going to youth group gets me grounded.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
i swear, about 40% of my drunken life is spent having sex with him.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
