if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
Actually, you don't want to see me.. reached an all time low drinking kahlua out of the bottle concealed in a macdonalds bag
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I just want a teacup pet pig so I can take him to parties with me and never have to walk home alone again.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
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