5 years of college and never once did they teach us how to respond when you overhear a group of 7th grade boys who are in your class talking about how you're definitely DTF
children are so perceptive these days... and horny
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
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