This is not my ceiling
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
im starting to measure my showers by the number of beers i drink while im in there.
Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
he bonged a 1/5 of jack and came back an hour later blacked out with a legitimate chicago firemans helmet
at least 'blackout me' had enough sense to take the puke covered duvet off the comforter.
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Randomize