She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
five cans of playdoh and a game of guess whose penis ...
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
All his ex-girlfriends are delicate flowers, tho. And I'm like a trash compactor.
I wouldn't worry about it. You know what they say, THICK THIGHS MAKE THE DICK RISE.
I hope April is a better month for dicks. March has been very disappointing.
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
Oh don't mind my cushion, I got plowed in the ass by a freight train last night
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
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