Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
He just walked in our room casually and said "big girls are hungry"
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
Please brint me miilk. I am on the floor but my door is open. Thank you, i appreciate u verry much.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
Is it totally acceptable to fuck a co-worker even though we don't speak the same language?
Why do you even have to ask me that question
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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