You're a womanizer and a bitch.
Dude, no matter how drunk you are, it's not okay to hug every other guy at a strip club. Mainly because boners are far too common.
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
Randomize
