You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
I just got off a plane from Mexico. At least 15 passengers dashed to the bathroom throughout the flight. Can you tell its spring break?
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
