And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
no they seem fine, they're doing push ups and waiting for a charging toy helicopter
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I should be free tonight unless my 5 speed vibrator arrives in the mail today, than we might have scheduling conflicts.
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
Randomize
