I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
I woke up wearing just my underwear and a headlamp at a different house than I remember passing out at. I told you irish car bombs are not made with an entire guinness.
i was getting a blow-job tonight in the mens bathroom of a bar and the bouncer comes in and says "bro i don't mean to cock block but you cant do that here."
They just both started mumbling "i cant go home like this" "it's all over my face" "do you have extra pants?"
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Idea for the cake. Joints for candles. Do it.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
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