so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
I can't believe I had to sit there pretending to play Halo with a condom on for 20 Minutes because your brother barged in to tell a story.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
He's listening to "my heart will go on" by himself in the living and its not even noon. MAKE IT STOP.
In honor of Super Tuesday, we should have the sex tonight.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
Randomize
