I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
dont worry it didnt get any better. she locked herself in his room and was screaming at the top of her lungs "IM GUNA PEE ON YOUR BED"
He came home all fucked up crying slammed his bedroom door and all we could hear for about three hours was THIS ISN'T GONA RUIN MYLIFe what happend
I told him I got this chick pregnant and he has to get a new wingman
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Fell asleep naked on the recliner spooning with my organic chemistry book. The fact that I made it through four years of college is proof that the education system is fucked.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
Just got high with dad
Correction: more high. He's sharing gummy bears with me.
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