I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
where am i from again
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
What happened to the watermelon?
You fucked it.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
Have I told you recently that I love you, if for no other reason than you make my irresponsible substance abuse look tame by comparison?
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
Once you've had an oral std scare, you're an expert.
And also ice skating can blow me. Goodnight, love you!
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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