On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
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