I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
So he passed out in the bathroom of the bar, woke up thinking he was somewhere else and called her flipping his shit because he thought she left him. She had to go into the men's bathroom to find him, and then he told her she was "trying too hard to be his girlfriend" over and over again.
Dont they live together now? Havent they been together for like two years?
Yeah. That's the best part. I always thought he was kind of a pussy but turns out he's a degenerate just like us. Welcome
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
Dude, I just hit your nipple with a bottle of lube while you were wearing a shirt, 10 feet away without my glasses and I only have "not bad" aim?
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
What do you do when you legitimately find a hidden sex dungeon in your parents basement next to your bedroom!!?
Randomize
