so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Woke up. Made a pizza. Burnt it. Going back to bed cuz today sucks
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
you literally pushed me forward in the seat so you could puke behind my back without the cabbie noticing..
Um please remind me to tell you what happened tonight. It involves wine, pain killers and firing a handgun in our apartment. Legit might be hiding from the cops this weekend.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
My vagina needs her own mother sometimes.
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
Why do I feel like I need to drink to feel better about the things I do when I'm drunk
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
