hotel room ftw
Bridesmaid dress fitting. I look like a Weeble and Michelle looks like Malibu Barbie. I have to keep reminding myself that she has herpes so really, the playing field is more level than it might initially seem.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
Well, remember that night we took shrooms at graces an had to leave immediately to go home and hold each other on the futon and sob for four hours? That bad...
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Got home and told boyfriend what happened. He was like "you made out with a guy you call Balls Deep?" and hi-fived me.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Randomize
