ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
i purposely bought her a small sweater. My way of saying, you've gotten fat.
No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Yo dude either Brian has herpes or he was jerking off to Web MD 'cause I just walked in on him
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Randomize
