Pro tip: Don't start playing Bejeweled on Facebook while waiting for your Adderall to kick in. Unless you have the next 9 hours free.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Randomize
