Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
This couch is so comfortable I can tell if it's like a waterbed or I pissed myself
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
my penis made a compromise with my morals
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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