I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
The words "my birth control fell out" should never be spoken
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
i've hit rock bottom. Eating pringles and playing taylor swift on guitar in my underwear at 11am on a wedensday morning. Sober.
You just sent a mass text asking if anyone ever drank the blood of a goat in the glorious name of Satan...after that we confiscated any writing utensil
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