If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Randomize
