From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I want "hickeys on my ass" sex
NoShamevember. You game?
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Some guy just ordered at Cosmo and 2 screwdrivers in the sky club at 8:30 am. I'm starting to feel a lot better about my alcoholism
Kinda suprised you didn't immediately ask about the lesbian ghosts tho
Just imagine a dick squawking like a parrot
Did u find my other sock in your bra? U said u were uneven so I did the gentlemanly thing.
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