Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
he came and i only had my diet coke to rinse.. can you say coke float?
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Come here I'm naked
And I want mozzarella sticks
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
I've got a tequila scented hand sanitizer for you.
you're the best roommate i could ever have.
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