I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
Why not. Its my b-day, you're in town, I'm in town, bars are in town, and alcohol is in town. I don't see anything not good about those things.
Oh my god, I am the best RA ever. I'm teaching my freshman girls how to deep throat on bananas as a group bonding activity. I'm making the religious ones eat them for potassium.
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
Made eye contact with a friendly neighborhood dog walker while violently puking out the window. How's your Wednesday going?
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
you were on all fours in the front yard puking, but managed to hand the pizza delivery guy a beer and to have a nice day.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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