I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
You have my approval. I will dance and throw skittles at your funeral.
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
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