Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
And i didn't ask you to do that, You showed your penis at your own free will.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
Jesus Christ. How the fuck do you not tell someone that your wife can see on the phone bill who you text and how many times ?
STOP BUYING ALADDIN PANTS WITH MY AMAZON CREDIT CARD
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
I'll give you one guess. It has a cock and I want it
Randomize
