Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I just shot gunned a beer for your birthday alone because you're too hungover at midnight to get out of bed. I'm not sure which of us is the bigger loser
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Using a joint as a bookmark. What is my life?
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
