her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
My dad told me my only assignment from now til graduation is to not die. it's a legit concern for him.
Apparently it's poor taste to ask for a break up blow job...in McDonald's. Also, that's not the best way to break the news either.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I'm not really sure if I peed the bed last night or if the cat was trying to get back at me for using her litter box last weekend
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Well. Now I feel like I put pants on for nothing.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
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