I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
False alarm it was margarita mix all over my hands not blood
Just got motor boated by a horse in the street
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Just left a strip club where they let me on stage to teach them tricks. Time of my life!
I honestly didn't think living in Canada would change me, until I found myself watching hockey porn
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
You probably shouldn't do that...but if you do take pictures
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
he's figured out my code; what are you doing = I haven't found a better dick yet
Randomize
