The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I'm talking like I woke up and her bra was spinning around caught on my ceiling fan
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
So I'm trying to figure out how to talk my boss into allowing pajama day once a week. Any ideas?
And somehow in between all the vomitting you managed to mumble "Well this is attractive!" And I swear that's when I fell in love. Best. First. Date. Ever!
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