Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I fear hooking up with people who have white pillowcases because my guyliner always smears on it and i either have to A. sneak out in the night or B. wash it and see them again
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
No, we talked about it. They're cool with me living here as long as I sleep with them both.
You're a rent hooker.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
i just deleted him from my phone. and yes... I did just text you this from less than 20 feet away.
I'm not judging.. I sure as hell am not getting out of my bed to come talk to you about this. but i support your decision
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
Here's a rundown of my night alone. Danced my ass off in the kitchen to FleetmacWood. Drank a little bit. Ordered $40 worth of Chinese food once the drinks kicked in. Picked up said Chinese in dirty sweatpants and slippers. #livinglife
Randomize