Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
I just hotboxed my laundry basket.
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
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