but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
Nothing says hey I wanna be your friend again like ambushing me with a dick pic
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
I haven’t sent any nudes yet in 2018.
That’s not true...is it?
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Randomize