Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
Hey man, did I leave the bottom drawer to my refrigerator that I had beer in at your house by any chance?
Sitting at a bar next to a guy wearing sunglasses drinking a pitcher by himself and having an argument with himself over if journey is more ballin than kiss. Feel better about myself.
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
Using mass transit when I'm hungover makes me feel like I missed my calling as a serial killer
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
Randomize
