are you still at the devil's house?
You smell like stripper and shame
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
