I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
You declared that afternoon sex will be referred to as "wet naps" from now on
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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