i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
Thats a flattering suggestion doug but lets be clear NO you may not put your face in my vagina just because ur not charging me a cover. sorry.
I showered today. Officially upgrading myself to useless.
i just shit on the floor of my room. my roommate was in the bathroom, my choices were limited.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
I seriously dont think i have ever ridden a horse sober.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
please dont ever try to drink horizontally again. I thought I was going to have to give you cpr
I still love him regardless of his misguided forays into heterosexuality
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Attention, i sprayed windex on me to disguise the scent of sex and regret off my clothes from last night
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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