Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
this probably sounds so sketchy, but hes going to jail in a month so he needs a place to crash for now. Hes sick though, and hes paying half our rent
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
if a CSI technician examined our hotel room with a black light he'd think we hit the Pulse button a DNA blender without a lid
I just formed the "shit on a tree in Chicago club." And I feel awful about it.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
We could never date. He doesn't drink and he won't bring me tacos after sex. He's on that healthy life bullshit.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
