belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
he's chasing his jose cuervo with hot tub water
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
you threatened to puke on the table cause they didnt serve eggs Benedict
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
Oh FYI, people asked how/why I met you and I didn't want to say "drunk at a party on an air mattress" so I made a story up. It was a very cute and charming story with no alcohol.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Randomize
