He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
Found her. Shes unconscious up against the room door. Her credit card is in the keycard slot
apparently i walked around all last night forcing people to beer bong whatever drink was in their hand. so far this morning ive had three people refer to me as beer bong man
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
Randomize
