I was staring at you from my window across the quad. I wanted to let you know so it's not creepy
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
a lot of self evaluation comes after you have to clean up a trashcan of your own vomit and condoms
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
He broke up with his gf yesterday so he could give me our annual Christmas sex at midnight.
Marry him. Now.
I keep telling myself that if Britney can make it through 2007, I can make it through this date.
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Neither of us have work tomorrow and we live w/n walking distance. This is your official Sandy booty call. Come rock me like a hurricane.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
Randomize
