He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
dude i feel like at any given point 3/5 of that family is trying to fuck you
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
I want to be done crawling through windows but the sex is too good to stop...but I'm running out of excuses for where the bruises on my legs are coming from.
You claimed your dick was a divining rod, spun in a circle 3 times and walked into the bar you stopped in front of...consequently there was a bikini shoot going on
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
George Washington did not fight for our freedom just to have people shit themselves all night
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Listen, I love you but you cannot refer to your dick as the holy sister anymore
Randomize
