honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I got head to The Nanny. Officially gay.
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
Just managed to stab myself in the ass with a fork. I feel that as my best friend, I'm obligated by friend code to inform you of that sort of thing.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
I bet my lungs hate me more than my liver
That's a hard toss up
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
Randomize
