We almost didn't get a second pitcher, but now we're getting a sixth.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
giving yourself 2 days to recover i see
I'll need it. Largely because i'm going to be stumbling through fancy restaurants with a bottle of whiskey insulting couples all night.
if i die of alcohol poisoning tonight, just know i kinda expected it and totally deserved it
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Let's enter the circle of trust. Are we there yet? Ok. If I somehow hypothetically slept with Amandas ex husband...on a scale of one to ten...how bad is that?
I'm in Burlington Coat Factory. This place'd be great if you were on E. There're so many textures...
I'm kinda hoping that if I rub the right object, a genie will come out
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
Randomize
